there are some days when I feel extremely frustrated at the people around me. I internally criticize everyone, seeing right through to their greedy tendencies or annoying naively. Interpreting incompetence in some that don't deserve it.
Or I would feel a rolling-eyes resentment towards student groups that think they are "all that," parading the superiority they fabricate from self-made exclusiveness. Excuse me for walking in your direction on Durant your HighnASSES I didn't mean to offend you. I find myself scoffing at the nerve they have. To dare assert that they have authority to evaluate your worth. It's bullshit how they can crush the spirits of eager freshman who are infatuated with the promising images of success and comoradary they present.
And then I get annoyed at the eager freshman face, the one that is dying to subject themselves. Come on, what do you stand for ;(... you want to be some else's bitch?
I'm not sure what ignited this hate-sounding post (i swear its not actually hate, just the worst cynical Angela today). It might be a short story we read in Asian Am.
Bread of salt. It was about this poor Phillipino boy who becomes infatuated with this wealthy pretty Spaniard girl. He deserts everything that is home to him in order to present this false facade that he's a wealthy and worthy suitor. He dreams of staying in expensive mansions and buying an expensive brooch for Aida. He sees his fellow Phillipinos as mere minions next to himself; rejecting his identity thinking he can foolishly vault himself to an unmerited God-like level he sees Aida as. He dreams of buying expensive things that he doesn't even understand, yet he steals food in his shirt coat which eventually contributes to his demise when Aida sees him doing it. He is a greedy dreamer and stuffs his mind with thoughts of material goods and money- all to impress some girl who does not even notice him? come on now. reality check.
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most vexing to me is when I see fakeness in people. augh.
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-cynic-gela. happier post to come later, i swear.
